My coworkers complain about me because I’m unlikeable. HR wants to meet in a few hours to talk, how do I handle this meeting? How do I change my behaviour?

Throwaway because my main has lots of info about my job, and I don’t want one of my coworkers to connect dots. Everyone is early to late twenties, with the exception of HR who is mid thirties.
Tl;dr: My coworkers complain a lot about me, most likely because I’m unlikeable. Recently I pushed back at a complaint because it’s not true, and now HR would like to meet with me in a few hours to talk about how I have a mountain of complaints. I never complain about my coworkers, so I am not sure how to defend myself without making it look like I am blaming them.
I’ve been at my job for about a year now. I work in a specialty area and my job is to do all the client related stuff- Find clients, follow up with them, etc. Because of the client oriented nature of my job, I work in a separate area of the building- think of it like, I work in the front whereas everyone else works in the warehouse or support rooms.
I don’t want to type forever and I really do need help because my coworkers complain a crazy amount about me, and our HR (we’re a small company so we have just one person in Hr) would like to meet with me in a few hours to talk about this.
This is something that has been building up for some time. I was hired because I care about our clients and am amazing with them, but for some reason, I just can’t seem to get along with my coworkers.
I think part of it is that I rarely see them, so I don’t have the same camaraderie that they have with each other. It’s not because I’m new, because a coworker who started 4 months ago gets along with everyone just fine.
Recently, my coworker “Anne†and I got into a bit of a disagreement. She had asked me to do something that, while it wasn’t exactly my job, it was a grey area and I could have done it. However I had another urgent task to complete, and she insisted I could do both at the same time. I didn’t think that was fair because it would mean half -assing two tasks, and I don’t like doing that. I delegated the tasks, and she complained.
My other coworker “Susan†has been there for a really long time and she likes to give really long lectures to me about any mistakes I’ve made. One time, I had asked during a slow time if I could complete X task ahead of time, and she spent 20 minutes telling me why I couldn’t. Also, Anne had complained to Susan about me not doing a task for her, and Susan told me why I should’ve said yes and how I’m not being helpful by refusing and told me, without saying it explicitly, that I should’ve half-assed both tasks. Susan also once told me off for asking one of the warehouse workers to do something for me which was a part of their job. She said I should’ve done it- which is true and I would’ve done it myself in the past, however they weren’t doing anything and my boss told me that she wants me to focus on doing the job she pays me to do. And she wants the other works to do what they’re paid to do, so it’s okay for me to ask them to do things that are a part of their job.
Then I have coworker “Samâ€. I don’t think Sam complains that much about me, and I think Sam and I sometimes do get along, but it feels like there is tension there. Part of it is that Sam is older than I am and started around the same time as me, so they think they have some sort of seniority over me and often tells me how I should do my job. Some points Sam makes are good and help me do my job better, but mostly it seems as though Sam expects too much from me. I do like Sam though, I think they’re neat and I want to get along with them more.
I think the worst though is Anne. She complains about my personality and how I’m very strict and uptight, about how I do my job, and anything else she can think of. I recently found out that she complains a lot about me, however when she makes mistakes or if I don’t like how she does something, I just let it go (unless it’s a big mistake). I recently found out she said I slack off a lot, and I did protest because I don’t slack, but it’s my word against hers. Especially because I don’t complain about her, so she has some history regarding my behaviour.
It makes me worried because HR wants to meet and if I do keep my job, it will make it difficult to mention her slip ups without sounding as though I’m doing it because she complained about me.
Also, here is another reason why I think I don’t get along with my coworkers- I’m super work oriented which can sometimes be :/ I had a bunch of trauma in my childhood so I find it difficult to open up to people. I try not to be, but I’m a little set in my ways which can make me difficult to change. I am trying to change that though.
I would love some advice on how my get along with my coworkers, and how to handle this meeting with HR. Especially because I cry when I’m upset and I don’t want to cry.


Source.