Hiya everyone, my ex and i broke up last December. We were dating on and off for a time. In all we were together six years. The problem is im still in Love with her. Why is that a problem. During our six years together she had a breakdown, three years ago, I supported her through the breakdown in every way that i could. Onbeknowns to me she stopped taking her meds, that is until it all came to a head & she attempted suicide last year. Again i stood by her and supported her.Just last week when i was calling to see a friend, I dropped in to see how she was doing. All the lights were off in the house, and i found her sitting in the darkness. I brought her to my place & rang an ambulance, as she was out of her mind. She wouldnt sign herself in & as we werent married i couldnt sign her in. I brought her back to my place. The following day i rang her Mother, who came and took her back into hospital, where she finally signed herself in.. Here's the thing, She told me she Loves and wantd to be with me.. But after six years I just don't feel like i can take the ups and downs.. The mood swings are extreme. They cause me so much stress. my Heart tells me to be with her but my mind says, things will never change. Its like she doesnt wanna help herself & blames me for ALL that has gone wrong in her life.. I only ever tried to do right by her, even when her own family tuurned their back on her, I was there to pick up the pieces. Now i just dont know what to do. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

i went through the same kinda thing with my ex, it was definitly a rough time, its hard to give anyone advice on that, one thing that did help was going to a health store and getting herbal meds, might help ur situation, sadly in the end of mine we parted ways, good luck to u

@OhMan: wow....

To craig1070 Thanks for the reply, Sorry it didn't work out for you and your ex..Yes i guess it is difficult to advise in such a situation.I'm at a loss as to what to do. I can't take much more of it, everything i try to do to help her, is wrong in her eyes.What people fail to see is the toll it can take on the partner of the sufferer. It almost has me broken.. To JustMeAndYou77 Yep! Such is life, hey.

I am so sorry you are going thru this. I haven't went through it with a partner but have dealt with the same issues with a sister for quite sometime. I had to finally tell her that everytime I got a call from her or anyone she talked to and she was in that condition then I wld call 911 and the ambulance wld be there before me, EVERYTIME! I have had to place her in several times against her will and it is just too difficult to advise someone what to do, you're never sure if urn doing the right thing or not. But one piece of advice i can give is to not take responsibility for HER behavior, she is the only one responsible for herself not YOU! Hope that helps, i really do....

It is still here OhMan

Thanks JLaDawn :-) you have no idea how much your message means to me. I can see you have an understanding where i'm coming from...It feel like everyone in her family & even my friends believe me to be responsible. It Hurts so so much. On one hand I Love the very ground she walks on. On the other hand its cutting me up so badly on the inside :.( the saddest thing of all is she "Won't" face up to her issues take the responsibility for herself. It has my Heart Broken. I have absolutely no support from friends & my Family tell me to leave her, that I deserve happiness in my life.

There comes a time Liam that you have to decide if your own mental health is expendable. For me the breaking point was my kids, I cldn't take her to the hosp anymore or drop whatever I was doing to take the knives or whatever she was using to try to hurt herself with away one more time. I had to decide that if she wasn't going to participate in her own therapy then I cldn't do it for her. And believe it or not when I stepped back she fairly quickly checked herself in and began to use the tools that she was shown and is much much better now. But if any of the other brothers and sisters or her friends find out she is back in that condition then they call me and I call 911, and she knows that is what we will do no matter how hard it is. Tough love truly is the best in these situations. Too often ppl focus on the one in crisis and dismiss the guilt and pain and heartbreak that the loved ones endure because they have no recourse to 'fix' it. I feel for you and recommend that you make use of a liscensed counselor to work thru your feelings of inadequacy and guilt. It really helped me focus on what was best and productive for her AND my kids. If you need to talk anytime feel free to message, text or call. :^)

@OhMan: Everything you have said sounds exactly like what I went thru.
You probably feel like you're getting slammed from every direction. Your family is probably worried about your
well being even if it doesn't seem that way. By the end of my relationship of 2 years with a very disturbed woman that I loved very much, I was sitting alone holding a gun to my head. A friend happened to stop in and talk me thru it. After we split she didn't get any worse but I got better. I think you've got some healing to do friend. Let your family and friends help. Good luck.

To Manondago, I'm sorry to hear that you went through that yourself. Thank God for your friend. Slammed from every direction, you hit the nail on the head there. I think my ex will be in the hospital for some time, so its a win, win situation. She will get the help she needs and it gives me the opurtunity to break away and work on my own rebuilding and growth. Yes, I will indeed let my Family and friends help. Thanks for your words of encouragement Manondago, its very much appreciated. Thank you.