My wife is complaining about her mental load making her feel alone.

(M45)y wi(F36)e and I just had another one of those long talks. She's very upset about what she calls her mental load. Basically, everything that our family does she thinks through in the most minute detail. For example, she talks about how even though I do the laundry, she will worry if I remember, think about how many loads it'll be, plan time to fold and worry if the kids will be in her way. We've been together ten years, but its been getting harder since the kids came along.
For those who asked, I am very active around the house. I take care of the kids more than half the time, do the laundry, take care of the house and yard, etc. I'm far from perfect, and my memory has been problematic lately but I'm far from absent or not pulling my weight.
She is very, very type A, and as of late I've found that she's wound very tight. I've been avoiding telling her when I'm having a crap day so that it doesn't wear on her.
Tonight she was complaining about how alone this mental load makes her feel, and the only time that she feels better is when she shares that with other moms.
I don't know how to help, I don't know how to make her feel less alone, and I don't know how much longer I can keep everything to myself to make her feel better.
Any advice?
TLDR: My wife complains about mental load, but I can't do anything to lessen it. How can I help?


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