All Forums >> Love Corner >> Relationship Issues

My fianc? (28M) and I (26F) tried the 36 questions to fall in love and it led to arguments and feeli (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (29 / M-F / Massachusetts)
20-Jan-20 5:35 am
My fianc? (28M) and I (26F) tried the 36 questions to fall in love and it led to arguments and feeling distant.

Hello, this is my first ever post to Dating.mobi (yay?). My fianc? and I decided to try the 36 questions that lead to love (If you have never heard of them, look up ?36 questions that lead to love NY Times?)
Well, I guess I mean that I decided. We had finished our normal dinner and TV routine, and had gone our separate ways. I went to go read a book and he started playing videos games. An hour or two later he was finishing up Need for Speed Heat and switching to Spider-Man, and I got this urge to do something with him. So I looked up things to do on a rainy day and found the 36 questions. I asked him and we decided to give it a shot, though looking back now he seemed hesitant.
Bit of background, we were housemates for a year and were the best of friends. A few months after I moved to another city we ran into each other and things became intimate, since then we have been in a relationship for three and a half years, living together for two years, and engaged for about 2 weeks.
Alright, back to the story. I made hot cocoa and peppermint schnapps, and he turned on the Netflix fireplace video. We snuggled up in some blankets on the couch with our feet in each others lap and started on the questions. Even with the first question things got weird. The question is who would you invite for dinner, he said this guy who?s name he couldn?t remember that could never be killed during WWI and eventually drowned in a river (sorry I tried to googling it and I couldn?t find the name), I said Jon Mulaney. He seemed noticeably upset about my response. As we kept going through things, he would get really upset if I tried to start a conversation from our answers (which is what I am pretty sure you are supposed to do). For instance, for the would you want to be famous question, he said he would want to be famous but after death. I asked why would you want something that you could never know happened or experience and if that meant he believed in some kind of afterlife? He got really mad and said he felt like I was putting him on trial. As this continued, we kept moving farther apart on the couch.
At the question about your fondest memory, he said he didn?t have any. I probed him, trying to be playful about it because I could feel he was getting into one of his moods, by saying well I know you have some memories even if they are just from today, which of those are the fondest? He got so argumentative that I said I think we should stop and we started getting ready for bed.
To be fair he has never talked about his childhood, he can?t remember any of it and it is kind of a sore subject for him. His mom thinks something happened at school, because he was a very extroverted happy kid and then suddenly became quiet and reclusive.
We went to bed amicable but I could feel the tension and a feeling of uncertainty.
TL;DR My fianc? and I tried the 36 questions to make you fall in love and it led to arguments and feeling less connected. I am now questioning our compatibility and whether he really likes me and enjoys my company.
Has this happened to any of you? All I have read online has been people either having the best experience or getting bored with the questions. None of them leading to fights.
Was he just in a bad mood and I should have waited to try it until he seemed like he really wanted to?
Or is this a sign of a more underlying issue?
Thanks Dating.mobi.


Source.

 

 

 
 
Quick reply:

[Smilies]

RULES:
  • Be respectful at all times.
  • Be mature and act like an adult.
  • Respect different points of view.
  • Discuss ideas, not specific users.
  • Don't get personal.
  • No profanity.
  • No drama.
  • No thread hijacking.
  • No trolling.
  • No spamming.
  • No soliciting.
  • No duplicate posting.
  • No posting in the wrong section.
  • No posting of contact information.
  • Be welcoming to new users.
Repeated violations of the above will result in increasing temporary bans from the forum and an eventual permanent ban from the site. Basically, just be friendly and neighborly and all will be well.
Similar threads:
Top
Home
Give us feedback!

Login:

* Username:

* Password:

 Remember me


Forgot?