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My (27F) boyfriend (27M) needs more time to decide whether to propose even though we?ve been togethe (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (29 / M-F / Massachusetts)
9-Jan-22 11:30 pm
My (27F) boyfriend (27M) needs more time to decide whether to propose even though we?ve been together for 5 years. Is it time to leave?

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 5 years now. I have repeatedly told him that marriage is something I want, and that I have always picture myself getting married in the future. I have also expressed to him that I want to marry him, and I do not see myself being with anyone else. He shares the same desire in that he too wants to get married to someone one day.
My boyfriend has repeatedly said he loves me, he wants a future with me, but he?s just not where I am in the relationship. He said he needs the next year to decide whether he wants to marry me, or whether he needs to leave me as those are the only two options left. He also said he would need time to plan a proposal after he decides, so it?s looking more like two years before I get engaged.
The idea of being in a relationship for 7 years without being engaged makes me nauseous. I told him I don?t need a ring, but I want at least some verbal commitment that he wants to marry me one day. He told me that if he gives me a verbal commitment, that?s the same thing as getting down on one knee, so he may as well just propose at that point. I disagree with that notion, but his opinion won?t change.
The bottom line is that I hate feeling constantly insecure about my relationship. I hate feeling less loved. BUT I don?t want to become a stereotype ? a woman who forces her boyfriend into proposing via an ultimatum. So, it will be on me to decide whether to wait it out for something that may never come, or to leave. But how will I know when it?s time to leave?
TLDR; My boyfriend wants to spend the next year deciding whether to propose or whether to leave me. The idea of being in such a long relationship with no engagement makes me feel insecure, less loved, and I need help deciding whether it is time to leave as I know I want to get married one day but it may never come.


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