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[UPDATE] My [24F] boyfriend [26M] spends holidays with his classic happy family while I spend them a (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (29 / M-F / Massachusetts)
30-Nov-17 12:51 am
[UPDATE] My [24F] boyfriend [26M] spends holidays with his classic happy family while I spend them alone.

Original Post
I was so nervous to see him after he got back from seeing his family because I was afraid my bitterness and jealousy would show in my reaction to his stories. But I had a long hard think after reading all the comments, and I decided I want to be the type of partner who can genuinely be happy for him. I realized that his good fortune has nothing to do with my misfortune. They're separate issues entirely and don't always belong in the same discussion.
So he told me about his trip—the cooking, card games, heart-to-hearts, long walks together—and I really listened without making it about me. I could tell that meant a lot to him. He wanted to hear about my week but I said I'd tell him later (wasn't quite ready to talk through all of it, but I've since told him everything).
Anyway, I asked him if he'd figured out his Christmas plans. He said he was heading to his hometown and asked what I'd do. I said I might go visit a friend but wasn't sure because I have a puppy who can't come. He offered to pay for a dogsitter as a Christmas gift, which was really sweet.
Then I went across the room to get changed and he came up behind me and held me and said, "or we could spend the holidays together." And I said, "Wait, I thought we already talked about that." And he said he'd thought it over and he really wanted me to be there with his whole family, especially after he got some quality alone time with them on Thanksgiving.
So I guess it's all worked out! Thanks for the responses, it got me to realize that my bitterness stems from my own family, not his. I have to work through it in order to be an independent person and a loving partner.

tl;dr: I managed to put my issues aside and be supportive about his family experiences. He ended up inviting me to Christmas! Thanks for the help :)


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