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Simple Jokes (by TenFour)
What do you get when you cross a pig with a frog? The answer is simple: a Warthog of course
THE TOP TEN FUNNIEST JOKES OF THE FRINGE
1. Rob Auton - “I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa.”
2. Alex Horne - “I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.”
3. Alfie Moore - “I’m in a same-sex marriage… the sex is always the same.”
4. Tim Vine - “My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him ‘Don’t be Sicily.’”
5. Gary Delaney - “I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell.”
6. Phil Wang - “The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men.”
7. Marcus Brigstocke - “You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost.”
8. Liam Williams - “The universe implodes. No matter.”
9. Bobby Mair - “I was adopted at birth and have never met my mum. That makes it very difficult to enjoy any lapdance.”
10. Chris Coltrane - “The good thing about lending someone your time machine is that you basically get it back immediately.” , http://www.edinburghnews.scotsman.co...a-it-1-3052823
1. Rob Auton - “I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa.”
2. Alex Horne - “I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.”
3. Alfie Moore - “I’m in a same-sex marriage… the sex is always the same.”
4. Tim Vine - “My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him ‘Don’t be Sicily.’”
5. Gary Delaney - “I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell.”
6. Phil Wang - “The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men.”
7. Marcus Brigstocke - “You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost.”
8. Liam Williams - “The universe implodes. No matter.”
9. Bobby Mair - “I was adopted at birth and have never met my mum. That makes it very difficult to enjoy any lapdance.”
10. Chris Coltrane - “The good thing about lending someone your time machine is that you basically get it back immediately.” , http://www.edinburghnews.scotsman.co...a-it-1-3052823
9. Bobby Mair - “I was adopted at birth and
have never met my mum. That makes it very
difficult to enjoy any lapdance.”
have never met my mum. That makes it very
difficult to enjoy any lapdance.”
Q: What do you call a million sex offenders at the bottom of the ocean?...A: a good start!
What did the parents name their new Chinese baby that was born with no arms?
Sum Ting Wong
Sum Ting Wong
Why does the mushroom always get invited to partys ?
because he is a fungi
because he is a fungi
What animal has more lives than cats?
Frogs....cuz they croak every night ...yea....I may have had one sip too many lol
Frogs....cuz they croak every night ...yea....I may have had one sip too many lol
One night a couple was lying in bed. The husband was fe frisky so he rolled over and tapped his wife on the should started rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says "I' honey, but I have a gynaecologist appointment tomorro want to stay fresh."
Rejected, the husband turns over and tries to sleep. A fe minutes later he rolls over and whispers in her ear "Do y have a dentist appointment, too?"
Rejected, the husband turns over and tries to sleep. A fe minutes later he rolls over and whispers in her ear "Do y have a dentist appointment, too?"
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