All Forums >> General >> Funny Jokes & Humor

~I'm Glad I'm A Man~ (For The Men) (by MysticJade)

 MysticJade 
24-Feb-13 1:23 am
I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe. I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese. I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts. I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west. I don't get wasted after only 2 beers, and when I do drink I don't end up in tears. I won't spend hours deciding what to wear. I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair. And I don't go around checking my reflection in everything shiny from every direction. I don't whine in public and make us leave early, and when you ask why get all bitter and surly. I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing. I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring. I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back. I don't carry our differences into the sack. I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you or think every guy out there's trying to steal you. I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too. I know what the time is and I know what to do. And I honestly think its a privilege for me to have these two balls and stand when I pee. I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball. It's more fun than dealing with women after all. I won't cry if you say it's not going to work. I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk. Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure. I won't assume it's permanent by any measure. Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see. I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery. I don't get all b*tchy every 28 days. I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise. I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true. I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!

 

 



Last edited by MysticJade; 24-Feb-13 1:32 am.
 
 
 Irishdaddy1 
24-Feb-13 1:28 am
@MysticJade: Thats great.

 

 

 
 
 bigred1219 
24-Feb-13 1:30 am
@MysticJade: so true but we do have to worry about certain things

 

 

 
 
 chikce (0)    (39 / M-F / Nigeria)
24-Feb-13 1:54 am
@MysticJade: so true but we do have to worry about certain things
yea dts very true

 

 

 
 
 brats52005 (52)    (54 / F-M / California)
24-Feb-13 2:10 am
Lol

 

 

 
 
 Kriswhite4u 
24-Feb-13 2:31 am
Love it

 

 

 
 
Quick reply:

[Smilies]

RULES:
  • Be respectful at all times.
  • Be mature and act like an adult.
  • Respect different points of view.
  • Discuss ideas, not specific users.
  • Don't get personal.
  • No profanity.
  • No drama.
  • No thread hijacking.
  • No trolling.
  • No spamming.
  • No soliciting.
  • No duplicate posting.
  • No posting in the wrong section.
  • No posting of contact information.
  • Be welcoming to new users.
Repeated violations of the above will result in increasing temporary bans from the forum and an eventual permanent ban from the site. Basically, just be friendly and neighborly and all will be well.
Similar threads:
Top
Home
Give us feedback!

Login:

* Username:

* Password:

 Remember me


Forgot?